Saturday, November 28, 2009

Maybe admitting more than I should

Yesterday - "Black Friday" - I stopped by Borders to pick up something, and was surprised to walk into a big group of people right when I entered the store. I saw a huge stack of Mistborns and other Brandon Sanderson books, and behind them a table with the author himself. Who is looking very much these days like Alan Rickman in Love Actually, but with darker hair:

I found a covert spot to spy from and decide whether or not to wait in line to say hello. But I was insecure already because I met him once when he was at our library signing books, and I was so excited to meet him that I was a babbling idiot and stammered out about how I just LOVED his books, blah blah, and basically walked away feeling completely stupid. So anyway, at Borders there were a whole four or five people in line, so I wussed and went on my way looking for my item, since I've already had enough humiliation in front of this guy to last me a couple of years. Plus a pushy salesman kept asking if I needed help while I was trying to scope out the whole situation, so I finally relented and had him look up my book on their inventory.

While I was waiting I said, "So is that really Brandon Sanderson over there?" He told me that it was and I smiled and said, "I'm a huge fan of his."

And this guy says to me, "Oh, have you read his books?", I'm just a HUGE fan of how much he looks like Alan Rickman right now, YES I'VE READ HIS BOOKS.

I didn't say that to him, but I'm pregnant and cranky and he's lucky I didn't. Thank you sweet grace that kept my mouth shut. I swear one of these days I'm going to lose control and some poor patron is going to get a crazy-pregnant-librarian-telling-off.

Brandon, I'm sorry, but is there some other reason that someone would be a huge fan? Are you an excellent air-hockey athlete? Maybe you turn ceramics when you're not writing? You've started your own line of graphic-imprinted designer jeans (a la Jon Gosselin)?

Anyway, there's no exciting conclusion to this story, I skulked out of the store without saying a word to Brandon Sanderson about how I think his work is brilliant or how cool his books are, and how I'm even so much of a dork that I want to buy a vial of allomantic metals from his website. Yeah. I admitted that one to my husband and the look he gave me pretty much stamped out that desire right there. Anyway, Brandon will be at Barnes and Noble in Orem on December 5th if I really start feeling any regrets... but I think I'm okay.

*In case you're wondering, "allomantic metals" are a major element from his Mistborn series, and the characters in the books carry around vials with the metals inside. So... you know, it's like wanting to carry around a "phaser" or wear Bajoran jewelry. Guh, please don't tell me you don't know what THOSE are either. Excuse me, I have to go crawl into a hole in the ground somewhere.

**My sister called and said I had to post a picture of what Brandon Sanderson REALLY looks like, because she and her husband know him. The whole reason I asked the Borders employee "is that really Brandon Sanderson?" is because he looked so different from the last time I saw him. Here he is, looking NOTHING like Alan Rickman:

This work originally uploaded to Wikimedia Commons by Nihonjoe


Ross and Kathy said...

I just read this post, but I think it was in Greek.

Nikki Jenson said...

Lol! I agree with idea who this guy is, or what you are talking about. Nevertheless, you are such a witty writer that I found myself laughing the whole way through. By the way, does my "elf-in" necklace from "The Lord of the Rings" count? (btw, it was '86-ed' a year ago!)

Hugs from mom said...

In church today Ryan leaned over and whispered, "I just want to be home reading Mistborn all day long." I remember that feeling of getting sucked in and never wanting to leave. He just started the third book and can hardly breathe for how exciting it is. Maybe I should take him to Barnes and Noble on Dec. 5th.

Breanne said...

Ooh that Arwen necklace totally counts, Nikki.

Jacque said...

I actually think he does look like him there! lol just a little... =)