Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Since everyone is talking about roles

I think roles are only okay when the people performing those roles consent to do so.

In a marriage, for instance, I think that if you're going to have roles, there needs to be a discussion about what those roles will be and both people need to agree. I think going into a marriage with an assumed role, or being told what your role is rather than choosing what it will be, becomes a breeding ground for resentment and unhappiness.  And I think the roles need to be up for discussion as your lives change and times change.

I know that I want to choose what I do in my life myself.  I don't want it to be told to me or chosen for me, or assumed for me - whether by a person, loved one, society or tradition.  I am the master of my own fate and I get to choose.  I choose to make that decision with my spouse and considering kind advice from loved ones, but ultimately, it's up to me.

You can love roles.  You can hate roles.  But I don't think anyone should be able to tell you what your role is other than yourself.

p.s. Commenting is turned off.  Here's a cute polar bear.