I was on the front page of BYU's paper today

That's me in the lower-left corner.
You can click on the image to go to a .pdf of the newspaper.



The photos are from September 2007. It's hard to know what to say about this - really it's kind of cool but sort of bitter-sweet at the same time. I really loved that job and I was so sad to have to leave. Isn't there some sort of saying about how ghosts from our past creep back from time to time?

And they could have spelled my name right. =) Just kidding, that's not a big deal. Actually I'm sort of more miffed that they used photos that I took of Kelsey without any credit to me... of course they had no idea who took them, I'm sure. That was actually something like Kelsey's first or second day working there, and she was obliging me by standing in for some photos - but we were being a little silly and she was making too-serious faces in some of the photos. So of course they chose to use THOSE photos on the front page of the dang newspaper. Poor Kelsey. She would appreciate me adding a disclaimer here - she in no way looks as "pleh" as she does in the photos, and is, in fact, a very attractive person. (In fact we were chatting about it and she said, "I could sue them for defamation of character") lolz.

Actually, I've been in the Daily Universe once before, when we were installing the Minerva Teichert exhibit that I worked on in different ways for about a year - first helping with the curatorial process of getting the exhibition ready to go (and the book that accompanied the exhibition), and then later I moved down to the registration department and had the good luck of getting to help install the show - so I was involved in a lot of the steps. It was great experience - it really showed how an exhibit goes together from beginning to end. So I like it that I had a little commemorative newspaper appearance to go along with the exhibit that was so important to me.



But today's article? Not really as gratifying. And I know that so many students do great jobs as employees at BYU and are inevitably let go when they graduate, and I bet that a lot of other students had jobs that they really liked and wish they could have continued. It kind of depresses me that I'm just another brick in that sad wall. Just another student employee who wishes they could have stayed. And now there are new student employees that stand out much stronger in the minds of those people who work there permanently, and if positions do open up, they go to the latest kids... I become more obsolete with each month that goes by. And that's really kind of sad.

Sorry! I have to dump a little. Last April, when I turned 24, I was so excited for the upcoming year. I thought it was going to be a great one. Instead, it has been the hardest and most difficult year of my life. Last summer life was so difficult to cope with, then my miscarriage in the fall, then winter rang in with kidney stones and five ER visits, and now we're swinging our way back to April with my wisdom teeth being removed (and now infected).

I'm aware of all the silver linings. But life is just so baffling and overwhelming sometimes. And we get little reminders (or, if not little reminders, then someone uses large space on the front page of the newspaper) - reminders that show us where we've been so far.

And sometimes it makes me just a little nauseous.